George W. Bush

Auf einer Propaganda-Tournee durch Amerika besucht Präsident George Bush
eine Schule und erklärt dort den Schüler seine Regierungspolitik.
Danach bittet er die Kinder, Fragen zu stellen. Der kleine Bob ergreift
das Wort:
Herr Präsident, ich habe drei Fragen:

1. Wie haben Sie, obwohl Sie bei der Stimmenauszählung verloren
haben, die Wahl trotzdem gewonnen?
2. Warum wollen Sie den Irak ohne Grund angreifen?
3. Denken Sie nicht, das die Bombe auf Hiroshima der größte
terroristische Anschlag aller Zeiten war?

In diesem Moment läutet die Pausenklingel und alle Schüler laufen aus
dem Klassenzimmer. Als sie von der Pause zurück kommen, lädt Präsident
Bush erneut ein, Fragen zu stellen, und diesmal ergreift Joey das Wort:

Herr Präsident, ich habe fünf Fragen:
1. Wie haben Sie, obwohl Sie bei der Stimmenauszählung verloren haben, die
Wahl trotzdem gewonnen?
2. Warum wollen Sie den Irak ohne Grund angreifen?
3. Denken Sie nicht, das die Bombe auf Hiroshima der größte
terroristische Angriff aller Zeiten war?
4. Warum hat die Pausenklingel heute 20 Minuten früher geklingelt?
5. Wo ist Bob???

George: Condi! Nice to see you. What`s happening?

Condi: Sir, I have the report here about the new leader of China.

George: Great. Lay it on me.

Condi: Hu is the new leader of China.

George: That`s what I want to know.

Condi: That`s what I`m telling you.

George: That`s what I`m asking you. Who is the new leader of China?

Condi: Yes.

George: I mean the fellow`s name.

Condi: Hu.

George: The guy in China.

Condi: Hu.

George: The new leader of China.

Condi: Hu.

George: The Chinaman!

Condi: Hu is leading China.

George: Now whaddya` asking me for?

Condi: I`m telling you Hu is leading China.

George: Well, I`m asking you. Who is leading China?

Condi: That`s the man`s name.

George: That`s who`s name?

Condi: Yes.

George: Will you or will you not tell me the name of the new leader of
China?

Condi: Yes, sir.

George: Yassir? Yassir Arafat is in China? I thought he was in the
Middle East.

Condi: That`s correct.

George: Then who is in China?

Condi: Yes, sir.

George: Yassir is in China?

Condi: No, sir.

George: Then who is?

Condi: Yes, sir.

George: Yassir?

Condi: No, sir.

George: Look, Condi. I need to know the name of the new leader of China.
Get me the Secretary General of the U.N. on the phone.

Condi: Kofi?

George: No, thanks.

Condi: You want Kofi?

George: No.

Condi: You don`t want Kofi.

George: No. But now that you mention it, I could use a glass of milk.
And then get me the U.N.

Condi: Yes, sir.

George: Not Yassir! The guy at the U.N.

Condi: Kofi?

George: Milk! Will you please make the call?

Condi: And call who?

George: Who is the guy at the U.N?

Condi: Hu is the guy in China.

George: Will you stay out of China?!

Condi: Yes, sir.

George: And stay out of the Middle East! Just get me the guy at the U.N.

Condi: Kofi.

George: All right! With cream and two sugars. Now get on the phone.

(Condi picks up the phone.)

Condi: Rice, here.

George: Rice? Good idea. And a couple of egg rolls, too. Maybe we should
send some to the guy in China. And the Middle East. Can you get Chinese
food in the Middle East?

I bet, you think, you are funny. Well, you are not. This is the kind of terrorism that I want to see erased from the face of this planet. God bless America.

Intoleranz ist die Wurzel allen Übels.

Dummschwätzerei ist die Quelle allen pfremmpfremmpfremmmpfremm

Ich weiß, für diese Phrase zahle ich ins Phrasendreschschweinchen ein.
Aber der hier eingeloggte Bush scheint (wenn man seine Postings so liest) ja Bedarf an Toleranz (nicht nur daran) zu haben. Das musste ich jetzt mal rausdreschen...

Falls es noch mehr davon gibt, bitte weiter, Bibo. Danke.

President George Bush is visiting an elementary school
today and he visits one of the classes.

They are in the middle of a discussion related to words and their meanings.
The teacher asks the President if he would like to
lead the class in the discussion of the word, "tragedy."

So the illustrious leader asks the class for an example of a "tragedy."

One little boy stands up and offers, "If my best friend, who lives next
door, is playing in the street
and a car comes along and runs him over, that would be a tragedy.

"No," says Bush, "that would be an ACCIDENT."

A little girl raises her hand: "If a school bus carrying 50 children drove
off a cliff, killing
everyone involved, that would be a tragedy."

"I'm afraid not," explains Mr. President. "That's what we would call a GREAT
LOSS."

The room goes silent. No other children volunteer.
President Bush searches the room. Isn't there someone here who can give me
an example of a tragedy?"

Finally, way in the back of the room, a small boy raises his hand. In a
quiet voice he says,
"If Air Force One, carrying Mr. & Mrs. Bush, were struck by a missile and
blown up to smithereens,
by a terrorist like Osama bin Laden, that would be a tragedy."

"Fantastic," exclaims Bush, "that's right. And can you tell me WHY that
would be a TRAGEDY?"

"Well," says the boy, "because it wouldn't be an accident, and it certainly
wouldn't be a great loss."